Ah, the yearly tradition of watching Evo, deciding to pick up a fighting game “seriously,” and then bouncing off days later when I realize the dedication needed to get good is incongruous with my life and sensibilities. I cherish it, truly.
Since none of the contenders are Virtua Fighter-related, I’m going to have to list each of these games and figure out if we’re compatible. Tell me what you think!
Granblue Fantasy Versus: Rising
What I know about it: I know that some of my saddest friends love this shit. It’s pretty when I put my eyeballs on it but I do not know what a Granblue is. I don’t know why it fantasizes. What are they fighting and why is it rising?
Why I think I might like it: It’s really pretty and if I don’t like it at this speed I can play an RPG about the same stuff. Right? Am I right about this? I’m so afraid.
Why I think I might hate it: What are the percentages? Hey what are the little icons? This might not be super legible to me now that I’ve watched the grand finals at Evo.
Guilty Gear: Strive
What I know about it: It’s gorgeous and oozing with style. I never played any of the other Guilty Gear games but the character design is always really interesting to me. I love big weapons and this game has that in spades.
Why I think I might like it: Weapons fighters are a favorite of mine, but mostly I just appreciate games that have so much flair it feels like it might explode out of the monitor. The game doesn’t feel super complicated but I’m willing to believe I’m too stupid to be good at anything.
Why I think I might hate it: So much shit on the screen I don’t know what to look at. I’m thirty nine.
The King of Fighters XV
What I know about it: The latest in a super long series of games I unfortunately fell off of once Fatal Fury morphed into it. I always liked it in theory but never invested the time or energy to stick with it. I’m more excited about City of the Wolves than I am trying to get into KOF at this point, but I still love a lot of the gameplay and design here.
Why I think I might like it: A who’s who of great characters in a style of game I used to absolutely adore. Maybe it’s not the pinnacle of the franchise, but I’m willing to hop on at this point and see what happens.
Why I think I might hate it: So used to Street Fighter controls I might “learning curve” my way into being so bad at this I bounce off incredibly fast.
Mortal Kombat 1
What I know about it: It has a terrible name. It reboots the series in the wake of Mortal Kombat 11‘s eventful ending. It looks like a million bucks and the basketball fans in my life generally love it. Sonic Fox is a lot of fun. Young Shao Khan is in it.
Why I think I might like it: I tend to shine with fighting games that give you fun little assists from CPU buddies so the Kameo system might be my best friend.
Why I think I might hate it: When I watch high level gameplay the juggling and combos make me so angry I almost can’t watch it. I don’t know what to tell you it’s all too sick for me to even engage with. Also I kind of hate realistic gore at this stage in my life.
Street Fighter III: 3rd Strike
What I know about it: I hated it when it came out because it took away all of my besties from Street Fighter II, but the truth of the matter is it’s perhaps the greatest 2D fighter of all time. Fast, fluid, beautiful, and complex, I am a late convert who absolutely adores this game.
Why I think I might like it: Well, I already do! Even the weaker characters both in design and execution are interesting to me and I like experimenting.
Why I think I might hate it: I am very, very, very bad at it. Just abysmal. Maybe that’ll get old.
Street Fighter 6
What I know about it: It’s a robust, impressive return to form for the best 2D fighting franchise in the land. I play it quite a bit and love that it works on desktop, console, and Steam Deck. I’ve played it consistently since it came out and have picked it up aggressively in Ranked Online since M. Bison went live.
Why I think I might like it: I already do! I feel like the meters in this one are easy to grasp and the balance feels great to a total novice like me.
Why I think I might hate it: I fear for the day I hit a brick wall and won’t really understand what I need to work on to improve. I know the high level play I saw at Evo is so much more cerebral than I am about this game.
Tekken 8
What I know about it: It’s a loud, explosive blast that’s feeling itself in a way I don’t think the franchise has since the sublime Tekken 3. I played it a lot in the first couple of weeks it was out but have fallen off of it a bit.
Why I think I might like it: I tend to do better with 3D fighters than 2D fighters (thanks Virtua Fighter), and in my limited time with online I was pretty solid with Reina and Dragunov, two characters that seem to have a high ceiling in the meta right now (who am I why am I talking like this I am a fraud).
Why I think I might hate it: High level play involves either an aggressiveness that feels otherworldly or great defense that feels way too smart for me. Also if Virtua Fighter comes back to prominence I’ll drop Tekken like a bad habit.
Under Night In-Birth Sys:Celes
What I know about it: Nothing, dogg. Absolutely nothing.
Why I think I might like it: No one I know plays it, so me being embarrassingly bad at it might not matter.
Why I think I might hate it: Watching the grand finals, trailers, and explainers about this game got me not closer to anything resembling understanding. I’m toast. I’m nothing.
